Wednesday, July 29, 2015

Let's Talk



 I met a member in Spencer who owns a Mystery Machine.
  He's kind of a big deal.


The title has a triple meaning due to a lot of the week's happenings.

#1 Angel, our amazing investigator, called us over and said he wanted to talk to us.  We went over not really knowing what to expect and after chatting for a bit, he told us that his girlfriend sent him a text saying that they should talk.  I think you can guess what happened.  Angel was pretty sad about it, and not really knowing anywhere else to go, he called his missionary buddies for some counseling.   The three of us couldn't even pretend like we understand girls, especially after 19-23 months of not going on a single date or anything like that, so all we could do was share with him Nephi's response to a question he didn't know the answer to:
 "I know that [God] loveth his children; nevertheless, I do not know the meaning of all things."
He just laughed and agreed with us that as long as we know God loves us and we keep doing the things that He's asked us to do, He'll put people who love us just as much in our path later on.  
 
#2 was a little bit more serious.  Lately the three of us have struggled a little bit with communication.  Our companionship inventory at the end of weekly planning showed a lot of things that we could work on together, all of which could have been solved sooner if we communicated better.  During my personal study Saturday Morning I studied all about how to best openly communicate with your companion.  I learned a lot about the importance of Listening and the importance of Charity.   During companionship study I grabbed 2 extra copies of the booklet they give everyone at the start of their missions called, "Adjusting to Missionary Life," and handed it to Elders Swan and Ferry.  I said, "Alright, due to how yesterday's comp inventory went, I think it'd be best if we took a little bit to read from this section so that we can make goals and plans so that it doesn't happen again.  Sound ok?"  They both agreed and as we read it we were able to talk about things that each of us can do better and make plans for how to make sure it doesn't happen again.  There's been such a difference over the past few days!  We work so much more effectively and have a lot more fun!  
Communication is SO important!  Always be open and loving.  That's what I learned this week.

#3 is a reference to the very little notice that the three of us had that we would be speaking in yesterday's Sacrament Meeting.   I had the privilege of speaking on Sacrifice and how important it is to sacrifice things to come closer to the Lord (time, talents, tithing, habits, etc).   I hope that something I said in the 10 minutes I spoke were of help.   Elder Ferry gave a great talk on the sacredness of the meetings in the church and Elder Swan spoke on the sacredness of the Sabbath Day.  

I hope you all had a great week!  I love you!  
Love,
Elder Paddock

PS 

Since the Section was so useful for us this week, I thought I'd share it with you!  It could help with any kind of relationship  (Roommate, sibling, spouse,neighbor, etc.)  I hope you enjoy.

Communicating Openly with a Companion  

Listen first. When you live with someone 24/7, you will notice some things that annoy you. You come from different backgrounds and have different expectations and “rules” for what is appropriate or normal. Your companion’s behavior makes perfect sense to him or her, even if it doesn’t to you. During companion inventory, find out more about how he or she sees things by asking questions and listening carefully. (See Preach My Gospel, 185–86.) 
 
Respectfully explain what is bothering you. If you are critical or angry, your companion is likely to become defensive rather than cooperative. Explain your problem and what you need rather than criticizing your companion’s bothersome behavior. For example, “I have a real dislike for dirty dishes, but I also don’t like doing them all myself. I wonder if we could set up a way to share this job.” Or, “I worry you’re angry with me when you’re so quiet. Could you tell me what you’re thinking?” 

Be straightforward and kind. Avoid negative labels or judgments. Don’t bolster your position with long lists of your companion’s faults. Try to keep an even tone that is not angry or self-pitying (see Ephesians 4:29–32). 

Don’t take offense. Take suggestions, even if rudely given, with as much grace and humor as you can muster.

Compliment your companion often. Thank him or her for things you appreciate. 

Ask your companion for suggestions on how you can improve. Also ask the Lord to help you see your weaknesses (see Ether 12:27). 

Try to do something nice for your companion every day. Fix lunch, listen, shine shoes, make his or her bed, smile, hang up towels, put away dishes, write a thank-you note to his or her parents, iron a shirt, compliment him or her.

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